February 2012
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shephards:
apriki:
sometimes when i’m sitting on a plane i look around me and think
is this a group of people in need of redemption whose lives have all previously intertwined and who will find peace with one another in purgatory
#’i wonder who they have murdered’ #’i wonder who are the other two members of my love triangle’ #’i hope the mystical time travelling island we land on has...
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The beginnings of the American Revolution,...
BRITISH EMPIRE: All right, fine, your stupid embargo worked. We won’t levy any more taxes-
AMERICAN COLONIES: Huzzah! Time to get drunk!
BRITISH EMPIRE: Except on tea.
AMERICAN COLONIES: What?
BRITISH EMPIRE: Get over it, it’s just tea. Seriously, where do you get this idea that you’re special and should never have to pay taxes? We hope that idea doesn’t go on to infect your political discourse centuries from now.
AMERICAN COLONIES: We’re not buying your stupid tea.
BRITISH EMPIRE: Are you being serious right now? What are you going to do, just stop drinking tea?
AMERICAN COLONIES: Yes. We’ll drink coffee.
BRITISH EMPIRE: Do you even know what that is?
AMERICAN COLONIES: No, but we’ve heard it’s good and we’re feeling surly.
BRITISH EMPIRE: Fine, whatever, we don’t even care what you do anymore.
BRITISH EAST INDIA COMPANY: Actually, we are pretty much bankrupt, so you need to make them drink the tea.
BRITISH EMPIRE: Oh, for—just drink the tea.
AMERICAN COLONIES: No.
BRITISH EMPIRE: Do it.
AMERICAN COLONIES: NO.
BRITISH EMPIRE: Drink it.
AMERICAN COLONIES: Fuck you.
BRITISH EMPIRE: Drink it or we’ll punch you in the face.
AMERICAN COLONIES: *Boston Tea Party*
BRITISH EMPIRE: What the hell?
AMERICAN COLONIES: We heard it was Indians.
BRITISH EMPIRE: That’s interesting, because we heard it was a bunch of colonists wearing paint and dressed in costumes that were remarkably similar to what a crowd of drunks who wanted to look like Indians would assemble if the only supplies they had were found in an alley behind a bar.
AMERICAN COLONIES: You get all types in Boston.
BRITISH EMPIRE: …*Coercive Acts*
AMERICAN COLONIES: Oh, it is ON.
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tyra banks: 10 beautiful ladies stand before me
tyra banks: but i only have nine pictures in my hands
tyra banks: and they're all of me
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capitolwifi:
If it’s a mutual follow we’re best friends
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Watch
This is the greatest thing.
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if my mom's still asleep: shh don't make noise she's asleep
if my dad's still asleep: shh don't make noise he's asleep
if my brother's still asleep: shh don't make noise he's asleep
if i'm still asleep: i need to vacuum for 3 hours and use the blender
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How people learn English language
Normal people: English classes
Me: Fanfiction and tv-shows
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